Tuesday, July 8, 2014

Bert and the Obvious Opinion

Bert is my boyfriend's nom de plume, his alias, his Witness Protection name. Well, except I just gave it away. Whoops, my bad.

Bert is awesome. He makes me laugh every day. He is smart and funny and irritating and cute as hell. And, unbelievably, my cat loves him. She has loved him since the first time she met him. Go figure.

Bert's feelings about this adventure vacillate between eagerness, skepticism, impatience, giddiness, and anxiety. The fact that he didn't laugh in my face and call me "Nut Job" when I seriously proposed that we should move out of the country has awarded him with a bazillion boyfriend points... to be redeemed at a later date (wink wink nudge nudge).

Here is my favourite Bert conversation this week. To get the full effect, you'll have to read my sections in a hyperactive bubbly girl voice, and his in a matter-of-fact deadpan male voice:
Me: "Where do you want to go? Ecuador or Guatemala? Or should we think about Peru again? I don't know. They all sound good and bad. What do you think?"
Bert: "I just don't want to get stabbed." 
What? Here I am frantically Googling information on everything from Yellow Fever vaccinations to overstaying your tourist visa to the best Internet provider in Guatemala, and he's sitting around worrying about something so mundane as getting knifed in the street. Pfft!

I'm kidding, I'm kidding. Bert's opinion is very valuable to me, even as obvious as his statement appears at first glance. I mean, of COURSE no one wants to get stabbed! (After hearing him say versions of this sentiment a few times over a couple days, I actually offered to stab him just to "get it  over with." He declined. Smart man.)

But seriously, safety in a foreign country is a big concern, especially in some of the places we've been pondering. I'll probably do a whole post on it later, but for now you can just chuckle along with me at the awesomeness that is Bert. :)

1 comment :

  1. Oh "Bert" your the most paranoid person I know lol